QuantumFog

October 31, 2006

Duck and cower

Glancing through the Willett Whaler or the Willett Elementary School website, one's impression of the small New England school is generally favorable. It gives no hint of sinister behavior in elementary school children when they're at play.

Principal Gaylene Heppe keeps the little reprobates in check by prohibiting the game of tag during recess. Her decision is bolstered by a parent, Celeste D'Elia, who proffers that such behavior is unsafe. Celeste proudly revels that her son can now avoid the bumps and tears so often found on playgrounds.

All this must be contrary to the school's namesake, Captain Thomas Willett. In addition to owning almost a square mile, 149 sheep, 12 oxen, 13 cows and 10 horses, his personal inventory included 2 cutlasses, 3 rapiers and a case of pistols. The items were no doubt used in his capacity as the head of the Plymouth colonial militia back in 1670. Bet he scraped a few knuckles and bumped into a few people on the way.

Heppe and D'Elia have the distinction of being our national idiots this week, as they deny their wards the terrors of tag and instead give you this. A picture of their students entitled "eating leaves".

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